a metaphor for self

 

I have a special affection for film. I love the loading of film into a camera. The careful process of threading 35mm film onto the spokes, the advancing of the pick-up reel. I love when I put a pack of film in my Polaroid camera and close the film door, that it immediately comes to life, clicking and whirring and shooting out the dark slide. Film feels so timeless, so classic to me. There’s simply a magical quality about shooting with film. Because you have a limited number of frames when using film, each click of the shutter is special. And that makes you slow down. Film helps you be thoughtful and selective in what, when, and how you shoot. There is a deliberate-ness that comes with shooting film. For me, I feel a wholly different experience when I am shooting with film compared to when I shoot digitally. When I’m out with my Polaroid cameras or my Canon AE-1, I find the time to be contemplative. Meditative

Along with that meditative process, shooting with film feels like allowing for the imperfect. It’s like saying “yes” to the flaws, to the not-so-spot on composition, to the under- or over-exposure. When I’m shooting with film, I’m not shooting 20 photographs of the same vintage car to get the shot “just so.” I’m taking my time, looking through my viewfinder composing and re-composing. And then when I feel ready, I click the shutter, usually just once. And I hope for the best. Sometimes the photograph is just what I had in my mind’s eye, and sometimes, many times, it’s not. And that’s all right with me. Shooting with film takes practice. And that practice means accepting that imperfections are part of the process. Seeing that those imperfections are okay, that they are what make that very image unique and special. That those imperfections are actually quite perfect just as they are – just like us.  

We are works in progress, too. We are the perfect imperfections of being human. Each of us flawed. Maybe a bit off-center. Sometimes over-exposed, like when we feel the harsh spotlight on us. Or maybe we’re more under-exposed, like when we don’t feel seen. As with shooting film, in becoming who we are, we need practice. Practice at being comfortable in our own skin. Practice at speaking up and voicing our needs. Practice at finding our place in the circle. Practice at being who we really are.

Shooting with film is helping me become a better photographer. It’s helping me focus on practice, my one little word for 2012. But more than that, shooting with film is helping me become the truest version of myself.  

Do you shoot with film? What does shooting with film feel like for you? Has it taught you any lessons? Please share a photo you shot with film with us today.

Image and words courtesy of guest shutter sister Meghan Davidson, contributor to Film26.

Comments

[Deb]

Lovely post! I shoot almost exclusively with film now as I find it far more interesting and enjoyable than digital. Here is one of my favourite recent shots, of my washing line ... http://www.flickr.com/photos/muddybarefeet/6840956308/in/photostream Shooting with film is definitely helping me become a better photographer too, as with film you have to understand the light, and the composition, the aperture and shutter speed, in order to produce a pleasing image. It's very different from when I was using primarily digital and would just click click away and then see what I could do with it in the computer. :-)

[Caryn]

I love this post and I love film. :-) I'd like to think that shooting with film has helped me become a better photographer as well. It's so easy, with digital, to just click away mindlessly. I much pefer the slow, deliberate nature of analog photography and the care one must take to make every shot count. The learning curve with film can be frustrating and expensive but I keep going. For me, it's worth it. http://instamaticgratification.wordpress.com/2011/11/29/402/

[Valerie]

I started with film and still miss the smell of the photo chemicals in my simple little b&w darkroom...
http://journeyleaf.typepad.com/journeyleaf/2011/03/photo-sessions.html

[Marcie]

What a beautiful piece about the metaphors of film! Altho I now shoot exclusively in digital - my formative and grounding years were in film. I do think they taught me how to look and see before I pressed on that shutter release.

[Lindsey]

I love this metaphor and agree so entirely with what you say about our flaws and imperfections, and about the fact that we are constantly in progress, in flux. xox

[life in eden]

I miss the smell of a dark room too. It was such a meditative place for me.

[gonzomama]

great post! one of the things i love the most about shooting with film is the acceptance of the flaws and not feeling like a i need to improve the photo with post editing. i'm not always happy with the flaws, but other times they add to the character of the photograph.

http://www.flickr.com/photos/59735955@N00/6839539158/

[Leslie]

Great post! I bought film and I have film cameras but I have not yet begun to shoot again. Hopefully this summer. I still have to figure out where to send it for processing. In the meantime, I shoot film cameras:

http://www.lightsandletters.com/writing/2012/3/28/photography-blogs-for-inspiration.html

In which I mention both Shutter Sisters and you Meghan! There is a link to Hei Astrid, have you read her blog? She posts a series about why people shoot film. Love it!

http://hei-astrid.blogspot.com/search/label/why%20do%20you%20shoot%20film%3F

[Debbie E]

I do love film so. this is a 35MM vivitar camera I love to shoot with. I also have two holgas and mad love 120 film. I also have polaroid cameras as well. I think film is such a romantic type to shoot with. The love is deeper,you appareciate what you are shooting more and have a sense of connection with it that goes deeper then digital.

[Cathy]

We have become a society of perfection haven't we? I have not shot in film is so many years. But when my father died I inherited his old camera. This post has inspired me to maybe see what I can do with it! Thanks so much.

[Corinna]

So great to see you contribute here! I don't shoot film anymore (though you always make me think about going back to try it again) but I do find that my photography practice constantly reveals things about myself and pushes me up against my edges. I find that it makes me HOPE that I, like my photography, am indeed a work in progress.

Hope to see more of you in this space, Meghan.

[Stephanie]

Beautiful post, and I love the accompanying image, too.
I shoot exclusively with film, using vintage and toy cameras, almost entirely medium format. Recently I started developing my own black and white. I came into film photography as a creative outlet relatively late in life, and it has been a wonderful adventure so far. It has opened my eyes and heart to so much I didn't see or feel before, or if I did, it was just scratching the surface. I love every aspect of it, including the imperfections and the "mistakes".
Lately I've gotten into pinhole photography which I love, too. Its even slower and more deliberate. A fairly recent image:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/a_perhaps_hand/6867118762/in/photostream

[Debra]

Wonderful post! I love me some film, for exactly the same reasons -- the slowing down, the permission to be imperfect, the happy surprises and perhaps most of all, the SOUND of my Poloaroids. I just have to remember not to be so stingy with them!
http://www.flickr.com/photos/manifeisty/6954076211/in/set-72157629492540989

[Sandee]

What a beautiful picture & story!

Ok, that's it. I'm getting the film Nikon I inherited down out of the closet. It's been way too long, but I think I need to give film another try.

[damiec]

yes. yes, and yes! I have been shooting an old, fully manual family camera since the beginning of the year. And while I still shoot w/ my dslr and always have my iphone with me (it's my light meter), I am finding that if I want to make my very best image, these days I am going for the film cam.
I am growing less cautious with each roll I get back, but I've noticed that I'm willing to take more time with my digital now too, and also I am much less interested in any post-processing tricks. So my film and my digital seem to be converging on each other, with the exception of my iphone photos, where I'm all about the bells and whistles.

Here's today's film shot for FILM26
http://www.flickr.com/photos/22487105@N06/

[Aimee Giese | Greeblemonkey]

I used to shoot film and the only reason I changed was really - money. I save so much money on digital. But I used to develop and print my own stuff in the dark room too and I could get lost in there for hours, days. I really do miss it. Awesome post.

[Kirstin]

What a wonderful post, dear Meghan!

[Elizabeth]

This post is wonderful, and I couldn't have said it better myself! I miss photographing with film, and since I've been out of school, I haven't had access to a dark room. What do other people do for a dark room? (I have the basics for developing film at home, but nothing for printing.)

[Kate]

Loved this post. I have always been interested in photography, but until recently never had the space in my life to seriously consider learning more. I've just finished my first DSLR camera course (purely camera, not photography course) and am so disheartened. While I love the technical aspects of photography, I was naive about what digital photography really is. So hearing "this will maximize what you can do in photoshop" at the end of every second sentence has made me question whether I really want to learn any more. My perception is that photography is no longer about capturing that perfect (to you) image, but about using the camera as a tool to gather as many images as possible in preparation for hours altering and tweaking in front of a computer. It sort of feels a bit like cheating; everyone doping at the olympics so no-one really knows who is a great runner - just who is the best at secretly doping. Is film the antidote? Or is there another school of thought amongst digital shooters?

[UpGemini]

I bought a fisheye Lomography for fun. It is defective and makes obscure rattling sounds every time I touch it, but when I develop a film it's a whole new exciting experience!
These are some shots from my hometown in Italy
http://upgemini.blogspot.com/2011/10/geography-quiz.html

[Jade]

I have shot film in the past but it is so expensive that I have had to take a break from it. I still splurge on instant film from time to time. Hopefully I'll get to shoot film more regularly some day!

[mary]

Meghan,

What a lovely thing to see you here at the Shutter Sisters. This is a beautiful post. YOU make me want to try film. Your pictures and descriptions have me longing to try it.

Question is: Where does one start?

Mary

[Meghan @ Life Refocused]

Thank you all for your comments about shooting with film and for sharing your thoughts and lovely images. I've enjoyed clicking through and checking out the photos that people shared. I'm thrilled that so many of you are encouraged to try shooting with film or go back to shooting with film. WOOT!! People have asked where to start...I say pick up a film camera, one you have, a relative's, one you find at a thrift store, and start playing and experimenting. Can't wait to see what develops {couldn't resist!}. xoxo

[Lisa]

I just recently (as in last week!) got my first film camera. I've been shooting with a digital SLR for two years, so it's exciting to now try my hand at creating film images. You're right. It's such a different experience. It makes me slow down, for sure! I feel like I am fully present in the experience. I notice the quality of the air and the light. I search more acutely for the angles. Each click of the shutter is potent, somehow more meaningful than with a digital camera. It's a truly magical and different experience than digital! Of course I will not stop shooting with my digital camera, but it is definitely fun to be experiencing film in this fun new way. I feel like I will learn so much about myself as a photographer shooting film. I can't wait until I am able to develop my first role! <3

[Tracy]

Love what you wrote about imperfections. So true. I just love the process of working with film!
Here's an imperfect shot that I ended up loving: http://www.flickr.com/photos/31417716@N00/6852535785/in/set-72157625464278005/

[mae]

what a beautiful post. i love the parallels drawn between our photographic and everyday lives. i'd love to get my hands on one of these old polaroids or other vintage cameras as my only experience with film produced results that were too literal and similar to shooting digital. perhaps it's time to start combing the local garages sales...

thanks for a wonderful post, meghan. lovely, as always! xoxo