On finding your own way
Wednesday, July 11, 2012 by Guest Shutter Sister 
In my bio you won’t find the words “I’ve had a camera in my hand since I was a child.” You won’t find the words “I’ve been an artist all my life.”
Because I haven’t.
At school I couldn’t draw or paint or stitch and if you’d asked me three years ago, when I was still working as a stockbroker, I would have told you that I wasn’t creative in the slightest. So when I decided, at the age of 32, to quit my job and go to art school to study photography it was as much of a surprise to me as it was to everyone around me.
But something was calling to me. Quietly at first, and then insistently. I was being drawn towards something that I couldn’t yet understand.
I adored being an art student, but I felt like a fraud. Still, I would try my best and hope for the extraordinary to happen. And happen it did.
One day, while sitting in the library pouring over late 19th century children’s book illustrations and lamenting my lack of ability to produce anything as wonderful, I began to wonder if I could create my own “photo illustrations.” Why couldn’t I use my camera to tell imaginary stories? Stories that had no beginning or end, but just a middle. Just a moment frozen in time, leaving the viewer to put the story in context, to create their own story.
This was the moment my series, “Tales from the Moors Country,” came into being. I took as my starting point the local myths and legends of Northern England and I created a series of silent and still stories that I submitted as my final portfolio piece.
They were all self portraits because I found that I just worked better when there was no one else around. Something I’d been waiting my whole life to share was finding its way to the surface and I couldn’t explain it to anyone else. But, more than that, I didn’t want to share it. It was such an incredible release of energy and I wanted to absorb every second of it.
Although my tutors found the work fascinating, I really think that they didn’t know what to do with me. No one could give me any advice on what to do with my work beyond suggesting I might try fashion photography, which was not an avenue I felt confident pursuing.
So I just started selling prints of my work at a local artists market. And then I added a line of greetings cards. Uplifted by the joy of seeing people respond to my work, I gained confidence and approached some local galleries. Then I tried entering some juried shows. And now, before I really know how it happened, I am a self portrait photographer.
That’s not something that any school careers counsellor would have recommended and it’s not something I could have chosen for myself when I quit my financial services career. It’s one of those magical things that happens when you just let go and allow the story to have an ending you didn’t envision.
So believe in happy endings. Believe in magic. Believe in hard work, dedication and the delicious joy of finding that thing you can’t not do. Believe in your dream. Because If a hopeless “non-creative” like me can find her own way, then I promise you, so can you.
Let's all share images today that remind us to believe in all these things and more....
Words and images courtesy of special guest Nicola Taylor. She can be found at www.nicolataylorphotographer.com, on Facebook, and on Twitter as @ZennicPhoto
Reader Comments (22)
Here's one of my 'moments' for today:
http://www.marciescudderphotography.com/home/2012/7/10/everchanging-vision.html
http://www.flickr.com/photos/gamaraca/7444566398/in/photostream
Here's a tree I pass every time I go to visit my parents. I've always loved this tree, so pretty!!
http://www.flickr.com/photos/80357694@N06/7532893804/in/photostream/
http://www.danielle-batog.com/2012/07/wishcasting.html
http://www.flickr.com/photos/alxleask/7435866032/in/photostream
i am on a similar journey, trying to find my photographic language... here's some of what has been surfacing the last couple of months, i can feel what it's about but am not quite there yet...:-()
http://www.flickr.com/photos/rakusribut/7549760724/in/photostream
http://www.flickr.com/photos/rakusribut/7549762250/in/photostream
http://www.walkingthrutheseasons.blogspot.com
Here is my most recent photo manipulation. It took 3 photos and about 2 hours of time. It includes my favorite quote about magic. :)
http://www.flickr.com/photos/kraft/6907579924/in/set-72157603919586451/lightbox/
Hi Marcie - Thank you very much! Loved your image. I just love those moments of really bright sunshine in amongst a storm. Feels almost spiritual.
Hi Gabriela - So glad you like my work. Your self portrait is lovely. Looks like a very dreamy moment.
Karen - I am right there with you sweetie. I got divorced seven years ago too and I know all about how you can lose your creativity altogether in such turbulent times and it can make you question whether it was really there at all. But I know it is. My humble advice for you is, now you've got a bit of space from it, and you're starting to find your photography again, use the heartache in your work. Don't be afraid of it. The heartache is what helps us to connect with other people. I love your tree too. The processing gives it a great gothic feel.
Alexandra - That image is stunning! Very atmospheric.
Anna - Thank you so much!
Barbara - Thanks!
Rakusribut - Thank you. I love to hear about people on a similar journey! You'll find your way with the "faceless" series of pics whenever you're ready. You don't have to have it all figured out just yet. Just keep going and it will come to you.
Sweetpea - Thank you so much. That really means a lot!
Angela - Thank you! Love the image on your blog. Looks like it was quite a sunny day but you've managed to get a lovely atmospheric feel in the picture.
http://sweetpeapath.blogspot.com/2012/07/bliss-and-grunge.html
I would have commented on your site but I don't have any of the profiles you need so I couldn't.
Lovely blog post....and a really great title!
I am sharing a photo that I took from the past, from a class where I have learned that taking self portraits can be so cathartic and healing.
Hello littlepurplecow - Thank you! Lovely to meet you too
Hi Carolyn - I'm so glad that you find self portraits cathartic. A lot of people find them very uncomfortable but I have always found that I do my best and most personal work when I am completely alone. I'm better able to "hear" my own creative process and I'm not spending any energy worrying about what anyone will think about all the twirling and hair flipping : )