seeing a different side of you

'Tis the season for being someone or something other than who we really are. It's not that we're trying to hide our truest selves, no way! This dress-up game is just for kicks. Scary, funny, adorable, whatever it may be, it encourages us let our hair down and have a little fun.

Who doesn't like a little make-believe now and again?

Whether it's you in disguise or your little ghosts and goblins behind those masks, share with us how you will celebrate this All Hallow's Eve.

balance

In my family, I fill a number of roles.  They include, in no particular order, the role of primary caregiver, wife, mother, friend, housekeeper, bookkeeper, librarian, storyteller, nurse, educator, cheerleader, and comedian. I have to put on my pants and fill the role of democrat, republican, and independent.  I am a chef, artist,  singer/songwriter, engineer, seamstress, stylist, decorator, journalist…

The list goes on.

Finding a balance between all of these roles may be one of the biggest challenges in my life, aside from trying how to fix a hole in the soft organza fabric that details the 15 princess dresses that are taking over my dining room table.  Not to mention trying to figure out how to get my 3 year old to eat.  Or sleep.  Or stop screaming all the time, especially when the baby is sleeping.  And to my 4 year old? No, I have no idea where the warthog toy is that you haven’t played with in 2 years but are suddenly obsessed with finding so stop asking me before my head explodes from repeating myself.

It’s all about balance, but how do you find that balance?

For me, it is all about moderation.  In regards to photography, and filling the role of the journalist, I find that I need to allow some moments to pass by, unrecorded. Picking up my camera was one of the most significant choices that I’ve made in my life.  Since then, I’ve taken thousands upon thousands of images.  It has become a part of who I am, and it has made birthday and holiday shopping for me incredibly easy.

I often need to remind myself, however, that my camera is an extension of who I am, and I cannot allow it to singularly define who I am (though it certainly does contribute to that definition). 

I think (I hope) that we all have moments that we would just like to leave our cameras at home.  Times that we just want to live in the moment and not be the one to document it. 

I try to have an ongoing dialog with myself, and when I wake up in the morning I promise myself that I will be there, and be present in my life and the lives of my husband and children.  I will use my camera with intention, and that moderation will allow me to find the balance I need to not only enjoy the time with my family, but it will save me from the guilt and regret of not getting any shots along the way.

How do you moderate yourself?  What sort of dialog do you use?  How do you come to the understanding that sometimes it is ok to leave your camera at home? That sometimes it is ok to allow the moment to pass, unrecorded?

Image and words courtesy of the lovely Meg Fahrenbach of Tea & Brie.

And hey! Don't forget that we're giving away some cool MOO products and a Lensbaby here this week! Awesome.

Notes from the Middle

It’s 6:33.  In the morning, not the evening.  And I'm sitting at my computer.  I’m not usually up this early by choice, but it’s the first morning after camp and something is different.  I’m different.  That’s the wonderful thing about experiences like this.  They change you.  They make you jump out of bed by choice at an ungodly (to me) hour of the morning to write things down, because you don’t want to forget…  

Most mornings, I hear the door of the boys’ room open and realize it’s still dark outside.   My first thought of the day is “It’s time to get up already?  Why couldn’t they sleep just a little longer so mommy could get a little more rest?”  Then comes the part where they climb into the bed, get under the covers, all poky knees and sharp elbows.  The bed immediately shrinks to the size of a postage stamp.  They cuddle close, searching for my body heat because the trek from their bed to mine has left their feet cold (very, very cold) and my skin is oh, so warm.  As they get comfortable, I feel the taking of me begin.  The taking that happens when you’re a parent to young children and your needs don’t come first anymore.  I guess this is what they meant when they said “parenting is the most self-less act in the world.  Don't do it until you're ready to give all of you to your kids”.

But today.  Today is different.  I’ve been away from them for 3 mornings. I’ve been inspired by the amazing women at Camp and their practice of shooting through gratitude, shooting with intention and shooting what you love.  I’ve been thinking about my passion for shooting life as it is right now, in this very moment.  I’ve been thinking about story and how even that seems too big for me.  Stories have a beginning, a middle and an end.  But that is too long for me, too drawn out.  Because sometimes, when I think about the whole story, it overwhelms me.  It reminds me that the BEGINNING of the week started off frenzied, with too many things on my to do list.  And I immediately just want to get to the END so that I can finally exhale.  What I’m finally realizing (thank you camp sisters) is that I leave no room in my life for the MIDDLE.  The right here, the right now.  When I’m focused on the END and just want to get there, I miss everything in the MIDDLE.  It's all a chore and I just want to get it over with so I can get to the END, to my prize.  I know in my heart that the END never really comes.  There's always a new BEGINNING, and a new END.  But isn’t the MIDDLE where the good stuff happens?  Where the joy is?  What am I missing by ignoring the MIDDLE?

Making this connection, right now at 7:07 in the morning, is blowing my mind.  My Mind = Blown.

This morning, when I heard the boys’ door open, a small smile crept onto my face.  I heard their quick, heavy footsteps and felt warm.  Warmer than my blankets could ever make me feel.  When they cuddled into me, I reached out and pulled them even closer.  I welcomed the feel of their skin against mine, regardless of how cold it was.  I listened as their breathing became rhythmic.  I breathed them in and wondered how I could capture this moment with my camera.  How I could remember that this morning, instead of thinking about how tired I was from getting to bed late and how many things there were on my to do list, I thought only about the good in that single moment in time.  And how blissful it felt.  How grateful I felt for my life.  For that moment.  In the MIDDLE.  

That is my passion.  Capturing the stuff in the MIDDLE.  The stuff that gets lost when you think about the BEGINNING and the END of the story.

That is what I learned at Camp and I don't want to forget.

What about you? Share a glimpse of what it looks like to be present and content in the middle?

Image and post Camp Shutter Sisters story courtesy of the awesome Wendy Tienken.

the lost years

 

After watching the Kelly Corrigan video about capturing life's everyday moments, I realized that digital photography has changed the way I document our lives.  I can scan through thousands of digital images of a freckly 12 year old, crazy dogs, and weekend adventures in Florida. 

But there is a glaring hole in the family story that makes me teary-eyed.  Like most of you, I missed capturing all these same activities with my older child.  We have an occasional photo from an old film camera or school photos but that is the extent of it.  No heartwarming shots of silly toothless grins, skateboarding with friends, or camping at the ranch.

I am now making it a point to seek out moments with my him before he heads off to college in January.  Quietly, I snap away as he strums his guitar, plays the piano, or falls asleep on the sofa.  I can not fill in all the lost years but as I hold these photos in my hands, I can see the little boy that he once was and the man he is becoming.

Take a few moments today to capture your loved ones as they go about their day.  Don't let even the simplest of moments pass you by.  You won't regret it.

We are giving away one $100 Paper Coterie gift card EVERY SINGLE DAY of September to one of YOU! All you have to do is share a comment each day before midnight EST for your chance to win that day's random drawing. Be sure to leave links to your story shots.

Day Off

This weekend, we ran away from home, if only for a day.  It was not a day to worry about what we were missing online, on television or what was still lingering on our to-do lists.  Rather, it was a day to give ourselves a break from responsibilities, spend time together as a family and indulge in our favorite activities.

Without the distractions, we focused on the simple joys of life.  And for our family, nothing soothes our tired spirits like visiting the ranch, playing with farm animals and walking the docks of the local fish camp.  We returned home relaxed and refocused.

Today, I invite you to share some images of your favorite activities. What do you like to do when you need to escape the day?

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We are giving away one $100 Paper Coterie gift card EVERY SINGLE DAY of September to one of YOU!  All you have to do is share a comment each day before midnight EST for your chance to Win that day's random drawing.  Be sure to leave links to your story shots.