On Sunday night, our family had a little scare: Alex wasn't herself all day, sort of just tired and lethargic. At the end of the day, we finally decided to call her pediatrician on call -- and soon after, found ourselves in the emergency room, with Alex on a nebulizer. Turns out she was having her first asthma attack, resulting from pneumonia we didn't know she had.
I remember a moment in the emergency room, watching Alex's limp body finally sleeping, at about 1 a.m. And I remember irrationally thinking: "I shouldn't have become a mother. I can't take this. I can't watch this. I'm not strong enough." Of course, immediately afterwards, I remember saying to myself, "Don't be an ass, Karen. She's going to be fine. What's the matter with you? In the grand scheme of things, this is nothing. And if this was something truly life-threatening, of course you'd be strong enough. You'd take a deep breath, and you'd deal. BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT MOTHERS DO."
Of course, everything is fine now, and all of us are breathing easier. And I think back to that night, I'm sort of shocked by the intense fear I was experiencing, motivated by intense love. Who would've thought five years ago I was going to be a mom, let alone love this little kid with the ferocity that I do? And boy, how I do.
Happy Love Thursday, everyone. Please leave your links of love in the comments below -- and be sure to check out the photos left in the Shutter Sisters Flickr Pool by keeper of the chocolates and tonyapoole for inspiration.
And may be you bowled over by the love you feel today.