A Legacy of Love

My father was a professional photographer, illustrator, ad man, and filmmaker.  He photographed Charles Lindbergh and other famous people, but his favorite subjects were my blonde mother, sisters, and me.  My dad died when I was 3, so everything I know or made up about him came from a lifetime of studying his prints. 

My sisters were a lot older than I, so they didn’t need pictures to jog their memories.   I was so young when he died that I still believed in magical thinking.  You know, “step on a crack” kinds of thoughts.  My father achieved immortality for me through his photographs.  At 13, Brownie Starflash in hand, I photographed everyone I loved to insure their permanence, and I never stopped.

The Starflash became a Nikon 35mm, which became a DSLR, while my own darkroom got better safe lights, a real sink, and suddenly an iMac appeared on my desk.  I breathe photography.  Yes, I know that capturing image doesn’t keep people from leaving me.  But, it comes close.  When photographing people, an immediate intimacy happens that stays in my heart through the archived moment.  I love everything about photography.

I have immersed myself in photography projects like, They Come and They Go; a series documenting everyone from UPS drivers to first cousins who visit me, “keeping track” showcasing objects relating to memory, or Loving Aunt Ruth; a 3-year odyssey into the life of my aunt, the last of my mother’s family that turned into a book with a possible 2013 release.  I am interested in memory, time, impermanence, and love.

In 2007, my oldest sister moved to live near her daughters.  I photographed her packing and the truck taking her away, and her move prompted a feeling of urgency in me to get closer to my Aunt Ruth.  I asked Aunt Ruth if I could photograph her for a book without imaging a “real” book was possible.  At the time, I was probably thinking of a photo album.  She said, “Sure, I’ll have a party, and you can meet all of my friends.”

Loving Aunt Ruth is the culmination of everything for which I have cared:  family, story, respect, hardship, triumph, humor, and my work as a photographer.  Since the book began with a party, I chose to end it with one.  My Aunt’s 90^th birthday was a beautiful place to close a journey that we began together.  Aunt Ruth had 165 people of all ages, ethnicities, and religions to her party.  I only “know” that many people on Facebook!

My father left me the legacy of an understanding of photography’s power which opened the door to my understanding of Aunt Ruth whose philosophy of living life guided by loving and caring for people has changed mine forever.   

In the last year, both of my sisters have died.  Aunt Ruth offered me comfort and wisdom.  I asked her how she stays determined in the face of so much loss.  She said, “I have my faith, and I have a will to live…that will comes from loving people.” 

 Image and words courtesy of Honey Lazar. Discover more about her and read more about her Aunt Ruth on her blog.  

Comments

[Marcie]

So great to see you and Aunt Ruth here Honey!!!

[Kathryn Dyche Dechairo]

I love what photography has given you.

[mitchell]

what a wonderful story and look to it's continuing story through your book. Thank you for your friendship this past year.

[kelly]

Your love of photography, and people, shines right through in your photos. Your heart is visible in every shot.
xoxo

[Lu]

This picture is simply stunning. I can not say enough to justify how it moved me.

[Ruth Blannk]

Honey, You say it so beautifully, it must come from your heart. Thanks for sharing that love with us. Ruth B.

[Aline Smithson]

As always Honey, so much from the purist place. You keep us aware of what is important. Thank you for being you.

[Limner]

This lovely piece forced me to comment. I have not left many comments here despite enjoying quite a few photos. This grabbed me for some reason. It pulled me in and held fast. So why am I crying? Your Aunt Ruth reminds me of my aunt, Pauline, who passed on a little over two years ago. I wish I could have done for her, what you have done for yours. Now I smile.

I look forward to buying a copy of your book. I hope you can notify me.

I like what your aunt said. I lost my youngest sister six months ago. I feel so broken. I hope you won't mind me writing down the wisdom I found. I can read it in my journal when I need reminding.

Thank you. Thanks to your aunt.

Sincerely sincere.

P.S. lovely photo. :)

[honey]

dear limner,

please send me a direct email, and i will let you know when the book is released. i sent your elegant and "sincerely sincere" comments to my agent.

thank you. aunt ruth thanks you as well, although she never seems to understand what the fuss about her is all about!

honeylazar4@gmail.com

[Keron Psillas]

Dear Honey,
We are all better for the privilege of Knowing Aunt Ruth, and knowing you. Photography brought us together, with its language, hope, and possibility. But what keeps us together is Love. Antoine de St. Exupery said that "Love does not exist in the constant gazing at each other, but looking outward, together, in the same direction." Our direction has been mutual respect and care...and the act of BEING that for others. You support, teach, encourage, cheer, speak plainly, and in all ways embody the wisdom of living LOVE that Aunt Ruth offers. Sorrow is the one of the vibrations that proves we are alive. I know that you are deeply in that vibration at this time, but even so, you offer us all a way forward by your example and courage. I can not wait for Aunt Ruth to be published and unleashed in this world! In gratitude and Thanksgiving.....for all of the Jessop women. Keron