thoughts on being seen

Polaroid by Meghan Davidson of Life Refocused

You know when you've had a good rich meal, it takes some time to digest it. I like to sit with the feeling of being full. It's decadent to be so happily content. Sometimes I sit with that feeling a long while. It leaves people wondering, "why's she so quiet?!" This was the case upon my returning from Camp Shutter Sisters. A month has passed. Photos have been shared, as have stories. and yet here I sit, still digesting. Not knowing what it was I wanted to share with others, what it was that I needed to keep sacred, and what was most important for me to focus on for my own growth.

This is my learning.
This is photography, no?

I spent the majority of my time at Camp speaking about self portraits. Here is where words cannot always express the conversations shared. I took no self portraits while I was at Camp. {I find humor in this} I've written before about being seen in real life and the value I place on the gathering of like minds, the importance of community, and the power that is stirred up in the Universe when we share intentions. All these thoughts were magnified during my Camp Shutter Sisters experience.

So, what is it that I brought home with me? It was more than loot and images and laughter and shells. It was the reminder that I am worthy.

We had just come back from a walk. A handful of Shutter Sisters, all of us with cameras. Meghan was holding that old familiar camera, the Polaroid SX-70, same as my fathers. I think we both saw the light at the same time, how could we not? It was streaming in through the windows begging to be seen. An exhale left her lips with a simple string of words, something along the lines of "I'd love to photograph someone in this light."

{let me note that it was jokingly said one morning at breakfast "I just wasn't expecting this... ya know, so many cameras!" And those of us who are camera shy all laughed at the absurdity of this statement. It was a photography retreat afterall. Were we expecting not to be photographed?}

This, being seen by someone else, allowing myself to be seen by someone is a place of growth for me. I can talk with my hands for hours about the importance of putting yourself infront of your lens through self portraiture, and yet when someone else holds the glass to my face I want to shy away. I took note of the light, of her generosity in asking so kindly, and I paid attention to the growing I need to do as a photographer.

These are the lessons that come from being on the other side of the lens.
These are thoughts on being seen.
I sat at the window and took a deep breath.

Why is this so hard for us? This allowing is mostly the unspoken plea, "I am no actress and so I’m freeing my insecurities to just be myself and let you document it." You see, there is trust there. Trust that the photographer sees you as you see yourself. As you feel in your skin. Even without enough notice to actually comb your hair free of coastal fog. This feeling of who we are sometimes does or sometimes does not come across in photos. Photography is mostly optical illusion. But this being seen, dare I say, is real life.

When was the last time you were seen? Today share an image of yourself that someone else has taken. 

*****

Thank you Meghan, for seeing me and sharing this most beautiful moment on film.

stories of experimentation

 PX70 Color Shade First Flush

When the folks at the Impossible Project released their first new instant films in 2010, I couldn't resist the urge to embark on a pioneering journey with them. Now, we are not "just" shooting with instant film again, which is in itself alluring enough, but we are shooting with new, amazing films that are still up for experimentation and refinement. In this new pathway, there is surprise, creativity, variety and possibility. I know it can be daunting to work with a medium that is somewhat unstable (and expensive) but there are no wasted shots. Everything counts because we are thinking and learning every time we compose and press the shutter.

Personally, I've had a bit of a hard time shooting with the PX70 First Flush (an earlier release of the now more stable PX70 color shade). But I persisted and I played with different exposures, light sources, intensities, etc. After many shots - a couple of (not wasted) packs - I got the shot you see above. Although it is still developing as I type (it should get less blue as it settles more), I already love it as is. Right now it is the perfect kind of weird for my taste. I love the bluish tones, the painterly feel and even the snake pattern in the lower left corner (my 1 year old model ain't half bad either ;))

What about you?  Impossible film or not, how do you push yourself and your medium? Today, share your shots and stories of experimentation with us.

And remember, we will be giving away one $100 gift card EVERY SINGLE DAY of September to one of YOU! All you have to do is share a comment each day before midnight EST for your chance to win that day's random drawing. Be sure to leave links to your story shots.

Instant vs. Instant

Whip out a Polaroid camera and the children will come running. They will surround you and look at you and this strange camera you hold as if you are from another planet. And they will ask questions. Many, many questions. How old is that thing? How does it even work? Film? What do you mean, film? A few might tell you they've actually heard their parents talk about these cameras. But to most, the concept is brand new. To take a picture with a Polaroid SX-70 and watch the faces as the image quietly appears is to experience a special brand of magic.

Adults are often just as mystified. Pull out a Polaroid camera on any street in any city in the world and someone will stop you. Someone will want to talk to you about it. They will tell you they didn't know people still shot with Polaroids and didn't they stop making the film ages ago? Then they'll get all soft in the eyes when they tell you about the Polaroid camera they grew up using. 

As a Polaroid photographer, I'm thoroughly charmed by these interactions. I really am. But every once in a while, there's a gap in the conversation. A few seconds, a pause. And I know what they want to ask, I know what they're thinking. Their bewilderment is practically palpable. Why bother with instant cameras when digital photography exists? In an age where there are phone apps that reproduce the general aesthetic of a Polaroid image in a couple of seconds, where does instant photography fit in? A digital camera in most every phone means that image sharing has never been more immediate. With apps likes instagram, I can take a picture with my iphone, choose from a variety of film-like filters and share the results immediately with the online world. How can instant photography compete with that? The answer is that it can't. It doesn't have to.

Because there's just no substitution for the real thing.

There's no sound like the zzzip and whirrr a Polaroid camera makes as it shoots a photograph out, there's no feeling like the one that comes as you hold that picture in the palm of your hand and watch as the image slowly appears. And, hard as they may try, they just can't reproduce what instant cameras and instant films do with color and light. This is not to say that I don't absolutely love my nikon DSLR. Or that I haven't (joyously) fallen down a sizable instagram rabbit hole myself. I wholeheartedly acknowledge that digital photography and iphoneography have pushed the medium in wildly exciting new directions. They're just not meant to completely replace all that has come before them. And in a world where technology seems to be pushing us all along at breakneck speed, I think we can't help but be drawn to things that force us to slow down.

When I shoot with my Polaroid camera, this is exactly what happens. I slow down. Ironically enough, the technology that so many originally associated with speed causes me to slow things down. When I look through the viewfinder of my Polaroid camera, I take my time, I think about what I'm shooting before I press that little red button. And as the camera spits the picture out, I hold my breath. 

Image and words courtesy of our newest regular contributor here at Shutter Sisters Andrea Corrona Jenkins, also know as Hula from Hula Seventy. (crowd goes wild). We are giddy to have her here!

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In honor of Andrea and all things Poloroid (Hula's trueest passion) we are offering a giveaway today! A comlimentary registration to her soon-coming teahouse workshop! Instant Magic. Sounds dreamy, doesn't it?

 Just comment here between now and Tuesday night (8/23 at midnight ESTP) with a warm welcome to Andrea to be entered to win. And feel free to share something you captured in an instant (with your camera of choice).

The Six Questions featuring Jesse Freidin

Photographer Jesse Freidin isn't just your average shutter brother. In fact, he's top dog. Literally. Jesse's unique style of dog photography has earned him critical acclaim and the praises of photography buffs and dog lovers everywhere. I mean, what's not to love? From his Doggie Gaga project to his latest photo workshop with the Impossible Project, Jesse is full of great ideas and awesome images!

We are thrilled to have him here answering our Six Questions. In Jesse's case, he opted to answer a few more for us. What guy! 

1. What's the story behind this photo?

This is one of my favorite images from my current Impossible Dog Series, which is created completely on The Impossible Project’s new instant films. I walk my own dog down this stair case every day on the way to the dog park, and have been dying for an excuse to photograph there- the light and texture is dreamy.

2. What was it that lit your photography spark? Do you remember a particular camera, course, person, roll of film?

I’ve been enthralled with creating instant images since I was little- borrowing my parent’s Polaroid and secretly wasting their film when they weren’t looking. But it wasn’t until I bought my first beat up old Polaroid Land Camera during my first year of college that my brain totally exploded. I remember peeling that first black/white peel-apart Polaroid and feeling my heart literally skip a beat. I had created something with this temperamental plastic camera that perfectly matched the image in my head. And it was beautiful and imperfect. From that second forward nothing has brought me more extreme joy than photographing. It is a need. It is a creative addiction.

3. What's your photo philosophy? Does it reflect your life philosophy?

A good question… Though I’m known for my work with animals, I do a fair amount of human portrait work (mostly for my personal portfolio) on the side. Yet my approach is always the same- there needs to be a connection between you and your subject, and within that connection there needs to be a string of emotion. In my head, that emotional string (it looks like red yarn in my mind… don’t ask why) connects the heart/mind of the photographer, runs through the camera, and attaches to the heart/mind of the subject. The photographer needs to open himself up to the experience of the image in order to create an authentic photograph. I’d like to say that this is how I live my everyday life as well, but it always seems easier to do when I have a camera in front of my face.

4. Where do you look for inspiration?

I feel inspired by watching people connect with their animal companions, and I feel inspired standing in the middle of a field in the middle of nowhere. I love taking myself to museums and wandering around, and building my photography book collection. I get a lot of inspiration from other photographers, musicians, film makers who push the limits of their field.

5. What would you say is one of your 'signature' editing tricks, themes or

style? What do you think makes an image recognizable and uniquely yours?

I use a 1970s Hasselblad, black/white 120 film, hand process all my negatives, print all my photographs by hand in my darkroom, cut all my own archival matts and frames, and make sure each piece that leaves the studio is signed and perfect. Start to finish I am creating my prints with my hands, and staying true to the craft of traditional photography. I guess I’m just stubborn, but I want to create the most intensely beautiful photographs I possibly can for my clients. And to me- a warmly printed photograph on the highest quality fiber based paper is the epitome of magical. I think I’m one of the last photographers using this method on the West Coast- maybe the country. I’ll continue printing this way until I cannot get supplies. Or pass out from chemistry inhalation. Whichever comes first.

6. What aspect of your photography are you constantly working on, trying to improve?

I’m not much of a gear-head, and never know what the newest lens is or who has the best pixelthings. But I’m always striving to learn from other experienced photographers, go to seminars or exhibits, and learn how to continue to stay dynamic. Also, I wish I was better at talking while photographing. But that one’s hard to practice.

 
7. If you could go anywhere in the world for an epic, week long photo excursion all by your luxuriously unhurried self - regardless of money, time or childcare issues - where would you go and why?

I drove across Rt. 66 years ago when I moved from the East Coast to California. I’d give anything to do that trip again, with 37 cameras in town. The desolation and color and space and light was just so inspiring.

8. Are there women out there that you consider your shutter sisters? Who, and why?

Annie Leibovitz and Diane Arbus are two of my top favorite photographers, and always have been. I think they are spiritual ‘shutter sisters.’ I could maybe be their ‘shutter brother.’

To learn more about Jesse and his work, visit his website and for more info about The Impossible Dog Portrait workshop at The Impossible Project Space in NY, check out this blog post. Rumor has it he has only a few spots left so if you want to attend be sure to sign up right away.

Let's give a big sisterly nod to Jesse, his imagery and the love of our creature companions by sharing our pet portraits today! Woof!

window shopping

I'm introspective by nature, so on most days you can probably find me doing some kind of soul work and pondering about art + life. On those many days, if you see me out in the streets with my camera, I probably have a faraway contemplating look, I'm starring at the horizon, and I am most desperately looking for something beautiful to catch my eye, just so I can shoot it and find some sort of relief to my longings. I know... Eeek, right?  I am proud of the fact that I try to live my life artfully, and with intention and mindfulness. On the other hand, living life (and shooting) like that can be too intense...

That is why some days are meant for window shopping! :) Shooting fun window displays has become one of my favorite pastimes. There is opportunity to explore composition, color, lighting, patterns, reflections, and the styling is already all done for us! There is no room for heaviness here, because why? Well, it's shopping, for heaven's sake! And shopping without the spending (which is even better), with the extra bonus of coming back with lovely photographs to keep. In addition, there is always the possibility to come back for more at the same exact spot, because windows change with the seasons, holidays and collections, offering the chance for a fun documenting project as well.

So who is up for some retail therapy? What do you say if we all lighten up, kick the winter blues, and share some cool window shots today?!

And if window shopping is not your thing (YET!), what do you shoot when you need to lighten up? Show us what you've got.

Also, you can probably tell I'm really digging polaroid these days, can't you? The sx70 has also helped me lighten up on gear and processing. I'm so glad there is a photography toy for every one of our moods out there ;P